nathan j hill (dot) com

writing, reflecting, and hoping for a transformed world

a #sermon from January 10, 2021 at University Christian Church from Jonah 2:2-9

Dear church,

It is Sunday after another long and painful week in our country, another low point for our nation in a string of low points. What happened on Wednesday may still have us stunned – because we are so close to Washington DC and have walked and worked and advocated on those grounds before and because we saw in the image of a Confederate flag, in the anti-semitic symbols by white supremacist groups, in the racist conspiracy-fueled madness on display, a continuation of an American history that worships violence, that celebrates us versus them.

Whether we want to call it insurrection, sedition, or a violent mob, those kinds of images are deep-seated in American history.

This year, for example, marks the 100th anniversary of the massacre of the wealthy black community called Greenwood in Tulsa, OK, where violent white mobs gunned down black citizens and set fire to businesses and homes, with the help of the National Guard.

Sometimes, we are not told that history – including those of us who grew up in lily white school systems – but that trauma and that violent mob look very familiar to those who study American history and recognize such low points.

Wednesday reminded us of this refrain: America is capable of being something special, and we are capable of being something awful.

Like you, I am still sorting through it all, trying to hold my tongue and my tweets, trying to be careful in what I say and process the loss of life, including 42 year old Capitol Hill police officer, Brian Sicknick, same age as me, who was beaten to death by the mob, and recognize acts of courage and integrity all around.

And I am listening for God, seeking to craft a prayer that will capture how I feel.

Maybe you are too.

What does it mean to pray when we are at a low point, swallowed up in the depths of the deep brought on by violence, division, and injustice? What words can we choose when we are angry and afraid, when we are at risk to lose any hope?

In our scripture today, Jonah the prophet delivers a powerful prayer of repentance from a low point – quite imaginatively from the belly of a fish at the bottom of the churning, chaotic sea.

Can you imagine what it might have been like?

The smell. The damp. The cramped space.

Of course, the Book of Jonah is more like a parable than an actual scientific blow by blow.

In all likelihood, if any of us were swallowed by a fish while visiting Bethany Beach, we probably wouldn’t have much time to pray.

First, how did Jonah get there?

At the beginning of this prophetic and powerful account, God says to Jonah, “Go at once to Nineveh, that great city, and cry out against it; for their wickedness has come up before me.”

But Jonah refuses – he resists God’s call. He gets the first plane ticket – or boat ticket – and leaves town.

Later, we would discover why – Jonah hated the Ninevites.

He didn’t want them to experience grace or generosity from his God, because he knew if the people heard his call and responded, God would spare them destruction. Jonah believed that those stinking Ninevites were scum of the earth. They deserved destruction. They deserved an angry mob. He had read about all the bad things they did on Facebook and decided that these people were irredeemable.

But God wasn’t having it.

A storm hits the sea, and the sailors freak out. As a last ditch effort to save their lives, they toss Jonah overboard into the churning water.

And scripture says, “But the Lord provided a large fish to swallow up Jonah; and Jonah was in the belly of the fish for three days and three nights.”

You can understand that Jonah was miserable.

He says to God,

You cast me into the deep, into the heart of the seas, and the flood surrounded me; all your waves and your billows passed over me. Then I said, “I am driven away from your sight; how shall I look again upon your holy temple?” The waters closed in over me; the deep surrounded me; weeds were wrapped around my head at the roots of the mountains. I went down to the land whose bars closed upon me for ever

Jonah could have made one heck of a blues singer. His words echo with desperation, shame, sorrow, and loss. His life is practically over.

The irony of this situation was that he was in that fish because of his own choices. He made his own bed and now he was lying in it. By turning away from God’s call to share expansive grace to his enemies, Jonah was in the pits, literally. And now he longed just to go back to the temple, to sacrifice to God, to make things right.

I suggest then there are two ways to hear Jonah’s prayer.

First, we can read it as a genuine turning point in Jonah’s life. He is now in an unimaginable situation in the stinky, watery belly of a fish, deep and distant from the life he used to know. He knows he messed up. And he is ready to change, to be someone different, to pursue God’s way. His prayer wells deep from his heart, representing a U-turn, what we call repentance.

But there is another way to hear these words, because as Jonah’s story continues, we discover this prophet has work to do.

When Ninevah hears to Jonah’s message of judgment, the people of the city, to his surprise, make a U-turn. They grieve, pouring ashes on their heads and dressing in sackcloth. They change their behaviors, even the people at the top. They cut off the conspiracy-fueled social medial channels. They refuse to hate their neighbors, even ones they disagree with. They care for the immigrant, the poor, and the widow. They honor God and turn away from their wickedness.

But Jonah, when he sees this, goes off, pouts, and wishes he was dead. He is disappointed that his enemies received grace rather than judgment. He is distraught, when just moments before, he was talking about all holy he wanted to be in the temple.

So we must wonder – is Jonah saying the right things to get out of his situation without actually going through any transformation? Is this prayer authentic or empty?

Jesus had something to say about religious leaders like this in Matthew 23:27:

“Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! For you are like whitewashed tombs, which on the outside look beautiful, but inside they are full of the bones of the dead and of all kinds of filth.”

Last week, hours after being evacuated and threatened by a raging mob, many of our leaders in the Senate and House took to their podiums and apparently found God. Their words and their tune changed with the world watching. All of a sudden, they spoke somberly about unity, coming together, and debate, when moments before some of them fundraised off of the riot.

Certainly, their words were needed to cool tensions.

Maybe their words reflected a real repentance and change in their hearts.

Or maybe in a few weeks, everything will go back to the way it was.

Jonah’s prayer in the belly of that fish gives us permission to speak to God in our low points.

To cry out. To lament.

To long for something different.

To seek repentance and return.

To speak to God when we are at our rock bottom.

And trust that God that hears us – whatever our rock bottom is right now.

But just like Jonah, we will be judged for whether our prayer means something.

Some of us, therefore, need to practice holding our tongues and let a few angry tweets/posts simmer for a bit before pressing post. Some of us need to be sure that our elected leaders are on speed dial. Some of us need to do a lot more listening to those who warned us that the threat of violence and destruction was real.

Some of us simply need to hear the truth – not conspiracy theories – the truth, and understand that hearing the truth is an incredible act of love.

But most importantly, we, as faithful Christians, must offer an alternative, however imperfect and messy it is than what we saw this week, a way that leads to abundant life and liberation from the sin and injustices of this world, a way that actively rejects racism and hatred, a way that seeks to hold one another accountable, a way that seeks to serve with humility and love, a way that ends the narrative of us versus them.

Or will our thoughts and prayers and Facebook posts end up being nothing more than hot air?

After Jonah finishes his prayer, the fish literally vomits Jonah up on to the beach.

Many churches this week are reflecting on the story of Jesus’ baptism, where he too was immersed in the chaotic raging water of the Jordan River and emerged with affirmation for his ministry to liberate God’s people.

When we are baptized, we too die to the fake narratives of sin and death and are vomited up to live into the way, the truth, and the life of Jesus.

Today, we are given another opportunity to show the world that our baptism means something.

God is vomiting us out after one more low point in our nation’s history.

Our call, like Jonah’s, continues.

In the words of St. Ignatius:

Pray as though everything depended on God; act as though everything depended on you.

Thanks be to God.

a #sermon from January 10, 2021 at University Christian Church from Jonah 2:2-9

Dear church,

It is Sunday after another long and painful week in our country, another low point for our nation in a string of low points. What happened on Wednesday may still have us stunned – because we are so close to Washington DC and have walked and worked and advocated on those grounds before and because we saw in the image of a Confederate flag, in the anti-semitic symbols by white supremacist groups, in the racist conspiracy-fueled madness on display, a continuation of an American history that worships violence, that celebrates us versus them.

Whether we want to call it insurrection, sedition, or a violent mob, those kinds of images are deep-seated in American history.

This year, for example, marks the 100th anniversary of the massacre of the wealthy black community called Greenwood in Tulsa, OK, where violent white mobs gunned down black citizens and set fire to businesses and homes, with the help of the National Guard.

Sometimes, we are not told that history – including those of us who grew up in lily white school systems – but that trauma and that violent mob look very familiar to those who study American history and recognize such low points.

Wednesday reminded us of this refrain: America is capable of being something special, and we are capable of being something awful.

Like you, I am still sorting through it all, trying to hold my tongue and my tweets, trying to be careful in what I say and process the loss of life, including 42 year old Capitol Hill police officer, Brian Sicknick, same age as me, who was beaten to death by the mob, and recognize acts of courage and integrity all around.

And I am listening for God, seeking to craft a prayer that will capture how I feel.

Maybe you are too.

What does it mean to pray when we are at a low point, swallowed up in the depths of the deep brought on by violence, division, and injustice? What words can we choose when we are angry and afraid, when we are at risk to lose any hope?

In our scripture today, Jonah the prophet delivers a powerful prayer of repentance from a low point – quite imaginatively from the belly of a fish at the bottom of the churning, chaotic sea.

Can you imagine what it might have been like?

The smell. The damp. The cramped space.

Of course, the Book of Jonah is more like a parable than an actual scientific blow by blow.

In all likelihood, if any of us were swallowed by a fish while visiting Bethany Beach, we probably wouldn’t have much time to pray.

First, how did Jonah get there?

At the beginning of this prophetic and powerful account, God says to Jonah, “Go at once to Nineveh, that great city, and cry out against it; for their wickedness has come up before me.”

But Jonah refuses – he resists God’s call. He gets the first plane ticket – or boat ticket – and leaves town.

Later, we would discover why – Jonah hated the Ninevites.

He didn’t want them to experience grace or generosity from his God, because he knew if the people heard his call and responded, God would spare them destruction. Jonah believed that those stinking Ninevites were scum of the earth. They deserved destruction. They deserved an angry mob. He had read about all the bad things they did on Facebook and decided that these people were irredeemable.

But God wasn’t having it.

A storm hits the sea, and the sailors freak out. As a last ditch effort to save their lives, they toss Jonah overboard into the churning water.

And scripture says, “But the Lord provided a large fish to swallow up Jonah; and Jonah was in the belly of the fish for three days and three nights.”

You can understand that Jonah was miserable.

He says to God,

You cast me into the deep, into the heart of the seas, and the flood surrounded me; all your waves and your billows passed over me. Then I said, “I am driven away from your sight; how shall I look again upon your holy temple?” The waters closed in over me; the deep surrounded me; weeds were wrapped around my head at the roots of the mountains. I went down to the land whose bars closed upon me for ever

Jonah could have made one heck of a blues singer. His words echo with desperation, shame, sorrow, and loss. His life is practically over.

The irony of this situation was that he was in that fish because of his own choices. He made his own bed and now he was lying in it. By turning away from God’s call to share expansive grace to his enemies, Jonah was in the pits, literally. And now he longed just to go back to the temple, to sacrifice to God, to make things right.

I suggest then there are two ways to hear Jonah’s prayer.

First, we can read it as a genuine turning point in Jonah’s life. He is now in an unimaginable situation in the stinky, watery belly of a fish, deep and distant from the life he used to know. He knows he messed up. And he is ready to change, to be someone different, to pursue God’s way. His prayer wells deep from his heart, representing a U-turn, what we call repentance.

But there is another way to hear these words, because as Jonah’s story continues, we discover this prophet has work to do.

When Ninevah hears to Jonah’s message of judgment, the people of the city, to his surprise, make a U-turn. They grieve, pouring ashes on their heads and dressing in sackcloth. They change their behaviors, even the people at the top. They cut off the conspiracy-fueled social medial channels. They refuse to hate their neighbors, even ones they disagree with. They care for the immigrant, the poor, and the widow. They honor God and turn away from their wickedness.

But Jonah, when he sees this, goes off, pouts, and wishes he was dead. He is disappointed that his enemies received grace rather than judgment. He is distraught, when just moments before, he was talking about all holy he wanted to be in the temple.

So we must wonder – is Jonah saying the right things to get out of his situation without actually going through any transformation? Is this prayer authentic or empty?

Jesus had something to say about religious leaders like this in Matthew 23:27:

“Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! For you are like whitewashed tombs, which on the outside look beautiful, but inside they are full of the bones of the dead and of all kinds of filth.”

Last week, hours after being evacuated and threatened by a raging mob, many of our leaders in the Senate and House took to their podiums and apparently found God. Their words and their tune changed with the world watching. All of a sudden, they spoke somberly about unity, coming together, and debate, when moments before some of them fundraised off of the riot.

Certainly, their words were needed to cool tensions.

Maybe their words reflected a real repentance and change in their hearts.

Or maybe in a few weeks, everything will go back to the way it was.

Jonah’s prayer in the belly of that fish gives us permission to speak to God in our low points.

To cry out. To lament.

To long for something different.

To seek repentance and return.

To speak to God when we are at our rock bottom.

And trust that God that hears us – whatever our rock bottom is right now.

But just like Jonah, we will be judged for whether our prayer means something.

Some of us, therefore, need to practice holding our tongues and let a few angry tweets/posts simmer for a bit before pressing post. Some of us need to be sure that our elected leaders are on speed dial. Some of us need to do a lot more listening to those who warned us that the threat of violence and destruction was real.

Some of us simply need to hear the truth – not conspiracy theories – the truth, and understand that hearing the truth is an incredible act of love.

But most importantly, we, as faithful Christians, must offer an alternative, however imperfect and messy it is than what we saw this week, a way that leads to abundant life and liberation from the sin and injustices of this world, a way that actively rejects racism and hatred, a way that seeks to hold one another accountable, a way that seeks to serve with humility and love, a way that ends the narrative of us versus them.

Or will our thoughts and prayers and Facebook posts end up being nothing more than hot air?

After Jonah finishes his prayer, the fish literally vomits Jonah up on to the beach. Many churches this week are reflecting on the story of Jesus’ baptism, where he too was immersed in the chaotic raging water of the Jordan River and emerged with affirmation for his ministry to liberate God’s people.

When we are baptized, we too die to the fake narratives of sin and death and are vomited up to live into the way, the truth, and the life of Jesus.

Today, we are given another opportunity to show the world that our baptism means something.

God is vomiting us out after one more low point in our nation’s history.

Our call, like Jonah’s, continues.

In the words of St. Ignatius:

Pray as though everything depended on God; act as though everything depended on you.

Thanks be to God.

a #sermon from January 10, 2021 at University Christian Church from Jonah 2:2-9

Dear church,

It is Sunday after another long and painful week in our country, another low point for our nation in a string of low points. What happened on Wednesday may still have us stunned – because we are so close to Washington DC and have walked and worked and advocated on those grounds before and because we saw in the image of a Confederate flag, in the anti-semitic symbols by white supremacist groups, in the racist conspiracy-fueled madness on display, a continuation of an American history that worships violence, that celebrates us versus them.

Whether we want to call it insurrection, sedition, or a violent mob, those kinds of images are deep-seated in American history.

This year, for example, marks the 100th anniversary of the massacre of the wealthy black community called Greenwood in Tulsa, OK, where violent white mobs gunned down black citizens and set fire to businesses and homes, with the help of the National Guard.

Sometimes, we are not told that history – including those of us who grew up in lily white school systems – but that trauma and that violent mob look very familiar to those who study American history and recognize such low points.

Wednesday reminded us of this refrain: America is capable of being something special, and we are capable of being something awful.

Like you, I am still sorting through it all, trying to hold my tongue and my tweets, trying to be careful in what I say and process the loss of life, including 42 year old Capitol Hill police officer, Brian Sicknick, same age as me, who was beaten to death by the mob, and recognize acts of courage and integrity all around.

And I am listening for God, seeking to craft a prayer that will capture how I feel.

Maybe you are too.

What does it mean to pray when we are at a low point, swallowed up in the depths of the deep brought on by violence, division, and injustice? What words can we choose when we are angry and afraid, when we are at risk to lose any hope?

In our scripture today, Jonah the prophet delivers a powerful prayer of repentance from a low point – quite imaginatively from the belly of a fish at the bottom of the churning, chaotic sea.

Can you imagine what it might have been like?

The smell. The damp. The cramped space.

Of course, the Book of Jonah is more like a parable than an actual scientific blow by blow.

In all likelihood, if any of us were swallowed by a fish while visiting Bethany Beach, we probably wouldn’t have much time to pray.

First, how did Jonah get there?

At the beginning of this prophetic and powerful account, God says to Jonah, “Go at once to Nineveh, that great city, and cry out against it; for their wickedness has come up before me.”

But Jonah refuses – he resists God’s call. He gets the first plane ticket – or boat ticket – and leaves town.

Later, we would discover why – Jonah hated the Ninevites.

He didn’t want them to experience grace or generosity from his God, because he knew if the people heard his call and responded, God would spare them destruction. Jonah believed that those stinking Ninevites were scum of the earth. They deserved destruction. They deserved an angry mob. He had read about all the bad things they did on Facebook and decided that these people were irredeemable.

But God wasn’t having it.

A storm hits the sea, and the sailors freak out. As a last ditch effort to save their lives, they toss Jonah overboard into the churning water.

And scripture says, “But the Lord provided a large fish to swallow up Jonah; and Jonah was in the belly of the fish for three days and three nights.”

You can understand that Jonah was miserable.

He says to God,

You cast me into the deep, into the heart of the seas, and the flood surrounded me; all your waves and your billows passed over me. Then I said, “I am driven away from your sight; how shall I look again upon your holy temple?” The waters closed in over me; the deep surrounded me; weeds were wrapped around my head at the roots of the mountains. I went down to the land whose bars closed upon me for ever

Jonah could have made one heck of a blues singer. His words echo with desperation, shame, sorrow, and loss. His life is practically over.

The irony of this situation was that he was in that fish because of his own choices. He made his own bed and now he was lying in it. By turning away from God’s call to share expansive grace to his enemies, Jonah was in the pits, literally. And now he longed just to go back to the temple, to sacrifice to God, to make things right.

I suggest then there are two ways to hear Jonah’s prayer.

First, we can read it as a genuine turning point in Jonah’s life. He is now in an unimaginable situation in the stinky, watery belly of a fish, deep and distant from the life he used to know. He knows he messed up. And he is ready to change, to be someone different, to pursue God’s way. His prayer wells deep from his heart, representing a U-turn, what we call repentance.

But there is another way to hear these words, because as Jonah’s story continues, we discover this prophet has work to do.

When Ninevah hears to Jonah’s message of judgment, the people of the city, to his surprise, make a U-turn. They grieve, pouring ashes on their heads and dressing in sackcloth. They change their behaviors, even the people at the top. They cut off the conspiracy-fueled social medial channels. They refuse to hate their neighbors, even ones they disagree with. They care for the immigrant, the poor, and the widow. They honor God and turn away from their wickedness.

But Jonah, when he sees this, goes off, pouts, and wishes he was dead. He is disappointed that his enemies received grace rather than judgment. He is distraught, when just moments before, he was talking about all holy he wanted to be in the temple.

So we must wonder – is Jonah saying the right things to get out of his situation without actually going through any transformation? Is this prayer authentic or empty?

Jesus had something to say about religious leaders like this in Matthew 23:27:

“Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! For you are like whitewashed tombs, which on the outside look beautiful, but inside they are full of the bones of the dead and of all kinds of filth.”

Last week, hours after being evacuated and threatened by a raging mob, many of our leaders in the Senate and House took to their podiums and apparently found God. Their words and their tune changed with the world watching. All of a sudden, they spoke somberly about unity, coming together, and debate, when moments before some of them fundraised off of the riot.

Certainly, their words were needed to cool tensions.

Maybe their words reflected a real repentance and change in their hearts.

Or maybe in a few weeks, everything will go back to the way it was.

Jonah’s prayer in the belly of that fish gives us permission to speak to God in our low points.

To cry out. To lament.

To long for something different.

To seek repentance and return.

To speak to God when we are at our rock bottom.

And trust that God that hears us – whatever our rock bottom is right now.

But just like Jonah, we will be judged for whether our prayer means something.

Some of us, therefore, need to practice holding our tongues and let a few angry tweets/posts simmer for a bit before pressing post. Some of us need to be sure that our elected leaders are on speed dial. Some of us need to do a lot more listening to those who warned us that the threat of violence and destruction was real.

Some of us simply need to hear the truth – not conspiracy theories – the truth, and understand that hearing the truth is an incredible act of love.

But most importantly, we, as faithful Christians, must offer an alternative, however imperfect and messy it is than what we saw this week, a way that leads to abundant life and liberation from the sin and injustices of this world, a way that actively rejects racism and hatred, a way that seeks to hold one another accountable, a way that seeks to serve with humility and love, a way that ends the narrative of us versus them.

Or will our thoughts and prayers and Facebook posts end up being nothing more than hot air?

After Jonah finishes his prayer, the fish literally vomits Jonah up on to the beach. Many churches this week are reflecting on the story of Jesus’ baptism, where he too was immersed in the chaotic raging water of the Jordan River and emerged with affirmation for his ministry to liberate God’s people.

When we are baptized, we too die to the fake narratives of sin and death and are vomited up to live into the way, the truth, and the life of Jesus.

Today, we are given another opportunity to show the world that our baptism means something.

God is vomiting us out after one more low point in our nation’s history.

Our call, like Jonah’s, continues.

In the words of St. Ignatius:

Pray as though everything depended on God; act as though everything depended on you.

Thanks be to God.

a #sermon from January 10, 2021 at University Christian Church from Jonah 2:2-9

Dear church,

It is Sunday after another long and painful week in our country, another low point for our nation in a string of low points. What happened on Wednesday may still have us stunned – because we are so close to Washington DC and have walked and worked and advocated on those grounds before and because we saw in the image of a Confederate flag, in the anti-semitic symbols by white supremacist groups, in the racist conspiracy-fueled madness on display, a continuation of an American history that worships violence, that celebrates us versus them.

Whether we want to call it insurrection, sedition, or a violent mob, those kinds of images are deep-seated in American history.

This year, for example, marks the 100th anniversary of the massacre of the wealthy black community called Greenwood in Tulsa, OK, where violent white mobs gunned down black citizens and set fire to businesses and homes, with the help of the National Guard.

Sometimes, we are not told that history – including those of us who grew up in lily white school systems – but that trauma and that violent mob look very familiar to those who study American history and recognize such low points. Wednesday reminded us of this refrain: America is capable of being something special, and we are capable of being something awful.

Like you, I am still sorting through it all, trying to hold my tongue and my tweets, trying to be careful in what I say and process the loss of life, including 42 year old Capitol Hill police officer, Brian Sicknick, same age as me, who was beaten to death by the mob, and recognize acts of courage and integrity all around.

And I am listening for God, seeking to craft a prayer that will capture how I feel.

Maybe you are too.

What does it mean to pray when we are at a low point, swallowed up in the depths of the deep brought on by violence, division, and injustice? What words can we choose when we are angry and afraid, when we are at risk to lose any hope?

In our scripture today, Jonah the prophet delivers a powerful prayer of repentance from a low point – quite imaginatively from the belly of a fish at the bottom of the churning, chaotic sea.

Can you imagine what it might have been like?

The smell. The damp. The cramped space.

Of course, the Book of Jonah is more like a parable than an actual scientific blow by blow.

In all likelihood, if any of us were swallowed by a fish while visiting Bethany Beach, we probably wouldn’t have much time to pray.

First, how did Jonah get there?

At the beginning of this prophetic and powerful account, God says to Jonah, “Go at once to Nineveh, that great city, and cry out against it; for their wickedness has come up before me.”

But Jonah refuses – he resists God’s call. He gets the first plane ticket – or boat ticket – and leaves town.

Later, we would discover why – Jonah hated the Ninevites.

He didn’t want them to experience grace or generosity from his God, because he knew if the people heard his call and responded, God would spare them destruction. Jonah believed that those stinking Ninevites were scum of the earth. They deserved destruction. They deserved an angry mob. He had read about all the bad things they did on Facebook and decided that these people were irredeemable.

But God wasn’t having it.

A storm hits the sea, and the sailors freak out. As a last ditch effort to save their lives, they toss Jonah overboard into the churning water.

And scripture says, “But the Lord provided a large fish to swallow up Jonah; and Jonah was in the belly of the fish for three days and three nights.”

You can understand that Jonah was miserable.

He says to God,

You cast me into the deep, into the heart of the seas, and the flood surrounded me; all your waves and your billows passed over me. Then I said, “I am driven away from your sight; how shall I look again upon your holy temple?” The waters closed in over me; the deep surrounded me; weeds were wrapped around my head at the roots of the mountains. I went down to the land whose bars closed upon me for ever

Jonah could have made one heck of a blues singer. His words echo with desperation, shame, sorrow, and loss. His life is practically over.

The irony of this situation was that he was in that fish because of his own choices. He made his own bed and now he was lying in it. By turning away from God’s call to share expansive grace to his enemies, Jonah was in the pits, literally. And now he longed just to go back to the temple, to sacrifice to God, to make things right.

I suggest then there are two ways to hear Jonah’s prayer.

First, we can read it as a genuine turning point in Jonah’s life. He is now in an unimaginable situation in the stinky, watery belly of a fish, deep and distant from the life he used to know. He knows he messed up. And he is ready to change, to be someone different, to pursue God’s way. His prayer wells deep from his heart, representing a U-turn, what we call repentance.

But there is another way to hear these words, because as Jonah’s story continues, we discover this prophet has work to do.

When Ninevah hears to Jonah’s message of judgment, the people of the city, to his surprise, make a U-turn. They grieve, pouring ashes on their heads and dressing in sackcloth. They change their behaviors, even the people at the top. They cut off the conspiracy-fueled social medial channels. They refuse to hate their neighbors, even ones they disagree with. They care for the immigrant, the poor, and the widow. They honor God and turn away from their wickedness.

But Jonah, when he sees this, goes off, pouts, and wishes he was dead. He is disappointed that his enemies received grace rather than judgment. He is distraught, when just moments before, he was talking about all holy he wanted to be in the temple.

So we must wonder – is Jonah saying the right things to get out of his situation without actually going through any transformation? Is this prayer authentic or empty?

Jesus had something to say about religious leaders like this in Matthew 23:27:

“Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! For you are like whitewashed tombs, which on the outside look beautiful, but inside they are full of the bones of the dead and of all kinds of filth.”

Last week, hours after being evacuated and threatened by a raging mob, many of our leaders in the Senate and House took to their podiums and apparently found God. Their words and their tune changed with the world watching. All of a sudden, they spoke somberly about unity, coming together, and debate, when moments before some of them fundraised off of the riot.

Certainly, their words were needed to cool tensions.

Maybe their words reflected a real repentance and change in their hearts.

Or maybe in a few weeks, everything will go back to the way it was.

Jonah’s prayer in the belly of that fish gives us permission to speak to God in our low points.

To cry out. To lament.

To long for something different.

To seek repentance and return.

To speak to God when we are at our rock bottom.

And trust that God that hears us – whatever our rock bottom is right now.

But just like Jonah, we will be judged for whether our prayer means something.

Some of us, therefore, need to practice holding our tongues and let a few angry tweets/posts simmer for a bit before pressing post. Some of us need to be sure that our elected leaders are on speed dial. Some of us need to do a lot more listening to those who warned us that the threat of violence and destruction was real.

Some of us simply need to hear the truth – not conspiracy theories – the truth, and understand that hearing the truth is an incredible act of love.

But most importantly, we, as faithful Christians, must offer an alternative, however imperfect and messy it is than what we saw this week, a way that leads to abundant life and liberation from the sin and injustices of this world, a way that actively rejects racism and hatred, a way that seeks to hold one another accountable, a way that seeks to serve with humility and love, a way that ends the narrative of us versus them.

Or will our thoughts and prayers and Facebook posts end up being nothing more than hot air?

After Jonah finishes his prayer, the fish literally vomits Jonah up on to the beach. Many churches this week are reflecting on the story of Jesus’ baptism, where he too was immersed in the chaotic raging water of the Jordan River and emerged with affirmation for his ministry to liberate God’s people.

When we are baptized, we too die to the fake narratives of sin and death and are vomited up to live into the way, the truth, and the life of Jesus.

Today, we are given another opportunity to show the world that our baptism means something.

God is vomiting us out after one more low point in our nation’s history.

Our call, like Jonah’s, continues.

In the words of St. Ignatius:

Pray as though everything depended on God; act as though everything depended on you.

Thanks be to God.

Every Christmas season, the Hill family watches a few classic Christmas movies that get us in the holiday spirit. One of them is the 1990 film, Home Alone. In the movie, Macauley Caulkin plays a precocious eight year old boy named Kevin who is accidentally left home alone all during Christmas. While at first he is excited to have the run of his house to himself, that quickly wears off as he fends off two would-be robbers and longs for his family to come home again on Christmas.

Home Alone resonated with me on a different level this year.

The image of Kevin being left behind, all alone, to fend for himself, is surely something that we understand from the past several months of pandemic life. Maybe we have felt like our leaders, the supposed adults in our nation, abandoned many of us as this pandemic continues to rage and so many are out of work. Maybe we have experienced the deep pain of grief, losing someone near to us and unable to find comfort with our family members. Maybe we are preparing for a Christmas home alone this year, even though we wish for anything else.

And maybe there are some of us who have felt abandoned by our church or even by God, wondering where that hope, peace, joy, and love we need has gone with over 300,000 Americans alone lost to this virus.

Did God leave us home alone?

Two thousand years ago, Mary and Joseph, on contrary, would have preferred to have their first Christmas home alone.

Instead, according to the decree from Augustus Caesar, they had to travel to Joseph’s ancestral home of Bethlehem for an imperial census. The census’ purpose wasn’t to make sure their democratic system was appropriately represented and government funds were put to good things like hospitals, roads, and social security. Rather, that census insured that the Roman empire was getting its tax money to fund the violent military occupation that made Mary and Joseph and their families’ lives hell.

Among the Judean countryside, people rebelled against this oppression anyway they could – by picking up weapons and trying to incite rebellions or working with the Roman occupiers to find compromise… but especially by crying out to God that God would save the people.

No doubt, in Mary and Joseph’s day like our own, there were those who believed God had abandoned them, had turned away from their cries, and left them all alone.

In the midst of this, Mary was pregnant, ready to have that baby at any minute, forced to travel through mountains to a crowded little village on a hill south of Jerusalem. And that night, Bethlehem had swelled with size as everybody and their kid and their kid’s kid came home. Every bed was full. I hear even the local Costco was clean out of toilet paper.

When her contractions began, Mary and Joseph’s only option was the part of the house where animals were brought in for safety during the night, a room wafting with the Christmas smell of... livestock.

The closest thing they had to a crib was an empty feeding trough, a manger, where Jesus was laid, screaming like all newborns do, waking up the neighbors, until Mary’s lullaby rocked him to sleep.

Mary and Joseph made do in that impossible situation, but can’t you imagine they would have loved to be in their own home, in their own bed?

Adding more misery, a crowd of shepherds, farm hands, fresh from working the fields that evening, knocked on the door and practically let themselves in, barely pausing to wipe their muddy shoes, claiming that they had seen angels in the heavens with big news, that this baby was no ordinary baby but the Messiah, the one come to save God’s people.

Mary and Joseph again would have loved to be home alone where they were private and had locks on their doors.

But they also had heard messages from angels, urging them not to be afraid and understand that their child was a gift from God, not just for them but for all who walked in the shadows and pain of an unjust, broken world.

I am sure they could see in the eyes of the shepherds and even those Magi who came later, in the eyes of their family members and the prophets Simeon and Anna, people who had been waiting a long time, hope reborn. God had heard their cries. God had not abandoned their people. Even more surprising, as the Message translation of the bible puts it from the Gospel of John, “God had moved into the neighborhood.” God had come home to be with God’s people.

That’s our good news tonight.

In a world two thousand years ago that was as messy, violent, and full of grief and pain as our own, when people questioned whether God answered their prayers and if God had abandoned them, God came to us.

Not in a display of power and might but in the vulnerable form of a child to share life with us and to show us a way to love and care for each other. And to ultimately, love us.

So while we might all feel a little like Kevin this year, abandoned by the adults in charge of our country, saddled with grief and pain, crying out for justice to be done, Christmas is God’s way of reminding us that we are never home alone.

But Christmas is more than a comforting thought. Like the shepherds, we are invited this night to go and proclaim what we have seen and heard, to work for a world where there are no more Kevins, no one who feels left behind and left out. Imagine what that world might be like – no families facing eviction, no transgender children kicked out of their homes, no need to march in the streets for justice for black and brown lives, no more violence on our city streets.

That is, as Dr. Howard Thurman writes, when the work of Christmas begins.

So, hear the good news. We are not home alone, even if our Christmas is going to look a little quieter this year. God is with us, and our God comes to invite us to create a world where no one goes to bed hungry or unloved. May we receive that good news. And may we, despite how hard this year has been, have a merry Christmas and then let the real work of Christmas begin.

Thanks be to God.

#Sermon Scripture: Luke 18:35-43

With our lives disrupted by this pandemic called COVID-19, many of us are watching with anticipation for a vaccine that could potentially save lives and return us to some kind of normal. Wouldn’t it be nice to get a shot so we can return to something of the life we used to know? Wouldn’t it be great to go grocery shopping without having to duck and weave around people? Wouldn’t it be awesome to be able to drop our kids off at school again, away from home, for several hours each day? According to a website called the History of Vaccines, a vaccine typically takes 10-15 years of development, with scientists first trying to understand a particular virus and learn how to reliably develop an antigen from the disease. The antigen itself is what prevents the disease, giving our bodies a means to fight off the virus. But to get to that point, not only must they create the antigen, scientists and researchers must test it, making sure it works safely in humans without damaging side effects. And then make enough to get to a widely available to people like us. In recent weeks, the FDA has been instructed to waive a lot of steps in order to speed up the process, but it may still take months to years before everyone has access to a safe, effective vaccine against this pandemic. I do have hope that a vaccine will be in our future for COVID-19 – vaccines of all kinds have already saved millions of lives from diseases that once preyed upon the vulnerable. But other than COVID-19, wouldn’t it be amazing if we had other kinds of vaccines? – Vaccines that inoculate us against the deadly effects of racism – Vaccines that prevent the spread of hatred against people who may seem different to us – Vaccines that eliminate violence against women – Vaccines that can topple the deep walls of division that are turn neighbors against neighbors We are hungry for a healing in this time of anxiety, fear, and injustice – ready for wholeness for our nation, for our world, and especially for our minds, bodies, and souls. Where, O God, is a vaccine that can heal that sickness? Jesus was a healer, although as far as we know, he did not develop vaccines. His healing stories remind us that Jesus had the power to mend wounds and hurting bodies. Healing stories in the Gospels are some of my favorite stories to try to understand what it means to follow Jesus. When I was a young Christian, the healing stories were simply remarkable for what they said about Jesus and his ability – I wish I could alleviate the physical diseases and conditions of my loved ones and friends. But as I have gotten older, I have noticed that the healing stories aren’t about Jesus showing off power. His healing acts give us a vision of God’s future for us, for all of us. In our scripture today, Jesus and his disciples are on the road to Jericho. This city has deep significance in our sacred stories – for we remember in the Book of Joshua how the people of God were commanded to march around the city until the walls came tumbling down. But Jesus, in Luke 10, also tells a story about a certain man who is going down to Jericho when he was beaten, robbed, and left for dead. Two religious leaders who are supposed to live and exemplify their holy scripture see the victim but pass on by down the road without stopping to help. It is a Samaritan, a non-Jewish neighbor who stops, tends to the man’s wounds, and makes sure he is moved to a place of safety. And so, as Jesus and his disciples draw close to Jericho, this parable comes to life. A blind man, hearing that Jesus is near, begins to shout, “Son of David, have mercy on me.” The crowd has forgotten the message that Jesus had given earlier and tells this blind man to shut up. To be quiet. We can think of all of the people who are ill, who are suffering right now, who are being told to be silent. We can think of the women who have been victims of sexual violence like rape or harassment being told by powerful men to be silent. We can think of families grieving the loss of loved ones due to police brutality or street violence or broken healthcare systems being told to be silent. We can think of those asking to be treated with dignity and respect because of their sexuality or their gender identity being told to be silent. Here, this blind man is told to be silent by those at the front – could that have been Jesus’ disciples, trying to ignore this person in need of God’s vaccine? But Jesus stops and notices this man on the side of the road. Jesus asks him, “What do you want me to do for you?” I imagine that a hush falls over the crowd as the words come out of their Rabbi’s mouth. Doesn’t Jesus have all the answers? Doesn’t Jesus already know this man’s needs? Jesus, however, engages this man not as a caricature or an annoyance but as someone who deserves the attention and care of the Son of God. He recognizes that this man is hungry for healing, and that hunger deserves to be heard. “What do you want me to do for you?” The blind man asks to “see again”. Yes, he is asking for sight to help him navigate the world, but he is also asking to be seen. Jesus sees him, hears him, and heals him. Don’t focus on just the individual being healed, but imagine all of the family members and extended community that had likely helped care for this man all the days of his life, providing meals even when times were hard, defending him against those who judged him. They too are transformed by this encounter with Jesus. The whole community when they saw what happened praise God! They can now see too that God, through Jesus, is still on the move, ushering in new possibilities for their lives and worlds, revealing that God sees their hungers for healing and offers us a way to a transformed life not just as individuals but as a whole community. If Jesus stopped by your front door today and looked at you, right into your eyes, and asked – “What do you want me to do for you?” – how would you answer? What healing do you need today – for a relationship, for a physical challenge, for a spiritual wound, for the ability to see? Think of everyone that needs to hear that question from Jesus right now. – Like those struggling on ventilators right now, those in hospitals with COVID-19, worried about never seeing their family again… – Like those struggling to battle cancer, even when the doctor’s head hangs low to tell them the bad news… – Like a gay, lesbian, or transgender teenager who came out to their parents this weekend and now find themselves without a home as their misguided parents try to punish them by showing them the door… – Like those crying out for dignity on our city streets to be heard, to be acknowledged, to be offered equal treatment under the law… – Like those who are feeling disconnected and cut off from the people they love… – Like those who are grieving the loss of their partners, their parents, their children, or their friends… “What do you want me to do for you?” Jesus asks. Our scripture reminds us ultimately that God is in the healing business – God is interested in our deepest needs and our deepest longings to be made whole. Perhaps our call in this time of division and disease is to stop as we proceed down to the Jerichos of our lives and listen to the cries of our neighbors and the cries of our own hearts. To take to Jesus our fear, our anxiety, and our pain, trusting that Jesus is asking us that question each day of our lives, waiting for our response, “What do you want me to do for you?” One of the stories that came to my mind as I thought about this scripture was from a youth Sunday school class I attended in my home church in Anadarko, OK so many years ago. Our teacher was Verl Daugherty, an long time leader and incredible man who cared about us young people at the church. That morning he was talking about miracles and healing, and he asked us, “What is a miracle?” I remember we argued a little bit about the definition, us young people who felt like we know so much about life already and a lot about God. A miracle meant it had to be God doing something out of the blue, out of nowhere, detached from anything in the world. It’s almost like we argued that miracles couldn’t happen in hospitals or through doctors or human relationship. Verl then told his story about being diagnosed by his doctor with a rare and life-threatening condition. He had limited treatment options, the best of which included going to the Mayo Clinic up in Minnesota. Unfortunately, time was short. To have the best chance to deal with this condition, he needed to get treatment immediately and the earliest they could book him was a few months away. I know Verl and his wife and our church prayed, asking and hoping for God to move. And then – out of the blue, the Mayo Clinic called and said, “We’ve had an opening two days from now. Can you get here?” Verl dropped everything, jumped on a plane, and made the appointment – saving his life in the process. I remember he turned to us and asked, “Now, for me, that was a miracle.” Miracles can sometimes look like vaccines. Like the kindness of a stranger. Like the strong leadership of one committed to changing broken systems. Like the generosity of a normal person like you and me. And especially like those moments when we truly see each other and listen to the deep hunger we have for wholeness. I’ve invited Gladstone to play something quietly, and while he plays, I want you to quietly imagine Jesus asking you the question he asked the blind beggar that day – “What do you want me to do for you?” Offer your hurts to Jesus today and trust that Jesus sees you and listens.

My father died on July 27.

He was a lifelong educator who passionately believed in his work.

He was lucky enough to be able to integrate his faith and his vocation all of his life as a public school counselor, advocating for children, believing in the power of education to change lives, and working for the best of everyone he served.

There are too many stories to share, and I will be writing a few of those to offer here on the blog.

I do want to link to G5Center to begin. One of the gifts that my father left my brother and I with was a passion to tinker with computer hardware. He encouraged us to be fearless and wise, to get our hands in there and figure out how technology works. To this day, his passion sticks with me. I often “pray” by spending time rehabbing an old computer, cleaning it up, exploring how to get more out of it by spending a few bucks, and making it work better. It's fun.

Read a quick article about this here: When a Dead Mac IIci is a Gift

Stay tuned for more.

Note: This #litany and prayer of confession was written in 2012 and links Palm Sunday and Advent.

Leader: Lord of Creation, You seem to be one that likes to make curious entrances into the world – burning bushes, wild dreams, booming questions, cryptic prophecies, a child born of a virgin, even a low budget parade. We confess that we don’t always see or understand the way You move in the world. We are not always on the look out or ready to join up in your cosmic procession.

On this day then, receive these prayers of confession and renewal. March into our midst today. Come, O Come, Emmanuel. March in and disrupt our everyday routine that we can live lives that are filled with justice and compassion. Come, O Come, Emmanuel. March in to our situations when we sin against You and our neighbors. Come, O Come, Emmanuel. March into our heads when we think we are not good enough. Come, O Come, Emmanuel. March into out hearts when we think we don’t deserve to be loved or have love to share. Come, O Come, Emmanuel. March into our silence when we feel deserted or abandoned. Come, O Come, Emmanuel. March into our grief and weep with us. Come, O Come, Emmanuel. March into this world that Your kingdom, heaven on earth, may reign forever. Come, O Come, Emmanuel. March against empires built on violence and war. March for youth and children abused and killed, for peoples oppressed and enslaved. Come, O Come, Emmanuel.

Leader: Hear this good news: There is room in God’s parade for saints and sinners, for idealists and pessimists, for young and old. God invites us to join the celebration – forgiveness and reconciliation abound! Thanks be to God. Amen

Creator, God of Justice and Reconciliation, We cry out – How long, O Lord? How long must our communities suffer? How long will black and brown neighbors be unheard? How long will justice be delayed? Right now, a deadly virus rages among us Not just COVID-19 - But the virus of white supremacy, indifference, and division. We witness it on the streets of Minneapolis, we glimpse it in the statistics of over 100,000 lost to disease we recognize it in generations that have been denied education, access, and voice in American history. Right now, O Lord, too many of us who are white and comfortable have been infected. We are content with the status quo. We are silent in the face of discrimination, inequality, and murder of our black and brown siblings. We believe we do not have power to change the trajectory of this moment. We have bought the tempter’s lie that it is someone else’s problem. We have chosen to be comfortable, closing the window to the Holy Spirit who even now gathers Her winds in preparation for change. Your Spirit is fierce and mighty, promising not to simply rustle our hair but alter who we are and who we can be. Your Spirit offers us an alternative narrative, “to loose the bonds of injustice… to let the oppressed go free.” Trusting in your grace, trusting in your capacity to alter this broken landscape, we repent of white supremacy. Empower us afresh to reject this demonic narrative that devalues lives and erects walls between our common humanity. May their names be on our lips: Ahmaud Arbery Breonna Taylor George Floyd and so so many more: (Silence.) May their deaths not be in vain as we seek justice and transformation. May those in power in our communities, lawmakers, law enforcement, and policy makers, know who we are and what we demand. May we take ownership of how we have contributed in our complacency and complicity to where we are today - and may we, enabled by the Spirit, work for change with boldness. Spirit, equip us afresh to imagine a just future for our families, our neighborhoods, our cities, our nation, and our world, one where no one is unheard. In the name of the Risen One, Jesus, Amen.

Like many pastors, I lead a faith community that is beginning to think carefully on how we will gather again physically during this pandemic in a way that is safe. Guidance continues to suggest some of the things we take for granted in our worship, like singing, should be avoided. The closeness we feel through handshakes, hugs, laughter, and deep conversation become vectors for the transmission of this disease which can harm so many.

I know the question for many Christians will be – is it church if we gather without hugs? Is it church if we cannot lift our voices together in praise and lament from the depths of our hearts? Is it church if we must maintain six feet of physical distance and minimize our time together for one another’s safety? Is it church if our practice at the communion table focuses more on sanitization than celebration? All of these realities make these decisions so difficult because we know, from previous pandemics and the nearly 100,000 lives already lost, life and death is at stake. When we do gather, it may not feel like the church we once knew.

And yet I recognize somehow that social distancing is woven into the very DNA of the church’s story.

Jesus regularly distanced himself, going out to pray to renew and recharge, and often invited his disciples to the wilderness or mountaintop or middle of the lake to wait upon God’s presence, away from the commotion of crowds and expectations.

The early church sustained itself and passed on stories and wisdom through the writing of letters, which we call the Epistles, instructing and encouraging early communities of disciples in how to live faithfully in anxious, oppressive times. Some of these letters were even crafted from prison cells.

The desert fathers and mothers fled the Roman Empire into the wilderness to wrestle with their inadequacies, pray in community, and pursue Jesus away from distraction and corruption. Generations of monastic orders continued that practice to this day, some even around the corner from where you might be reading this.

And there have always been those who have been turned away by church structures and leaders and had to form their own socially distant networks, resources, and communities to foster alternate narratives and ways of holy living, speaking words of affirmation and justice to those marginalized and wounded by systems of power.

Perhaps social distance for people of faith provides an opportunity to save lives not just from a pandemic but also from systemic evils that take lives everyday by providing us a time to look at what exists, critique it, and reimagine what might be. Reimagine a church where no one is socially distanced by the misuse of power. Reimagine a church where the care of the most vulnerable is at the core of who we are. And live into that imagination.